I stopped regularly attending church nine years ago when I discovered the church I’d been a member of for close to a decade was, in my opinion, little more than a country club with a cross. I don’t want to assert that all churches or church members are phony; most aren’t, and I still believe in the inherent good which exists in all God’s children. Ironically, though, my decision to leave the church brought me closer to God, so I haven’t bothered seeking another church to join.
My Sunday mornings are far less hurried and much more peaceful now. That could be due to the fact that I’ve gained empty-nester status since leaving the church, but I like to think it’s because I awake without an alarm. Alarms are, well, alarming, so in my opinion, peaceful mornings should begin organically.
I also brew a pot of coffee on Sunday mornings rather than my usual, single-serve, travel cup that I make during the work week. My boyfriend and I cook a big breakfast of bacon, eggs, grits, livermush, hash browns, toast and warm apples (yes, we're from the South) then sit down and commune over a cup of coffee – or two. After all, I do brew a whole pot.
At 9 a.m. my “church,” CBS Sunday Morning, begins. The show opens with Wynton Marsalis’ trumpet rendition of Abblasen and a colorful logo of a sun rising from the bottom of my tv screen. For me, both the music and the video signal the start of a new day, a new week, and new possibilities. The show touches only briefly on the heavy news stories that saturate headlines throughout the week. Instead, well-known as well as unknown personalities are the subjects of casual but intriguing profile pieces, and the show’s correspondents explore topics ranging from the color pink to fruitcakes. While watching each week, I’m often reminded of Christian values I learned in church even though there’s the absence of sermons and prayers and professions of faith. My favorite part of the show, however, is the reflective segment titled “Moment of Nature.” It’s the perfect way to end the “church service” each week, and I’m always reminded of Psalm 46:10, “Be still and know that I am God.”
Beyond my Sunday morning, spiritual, television experience, I’ve sought to make connections with local groups and organizations whose missions are to improve and enhance my neighborhood and global communities. Many of these groups are non-denominational. In fact, most don’t identify with a particular religion at all, but they feed the hungry, care for the orphans, and aid the sick - all things that Christ called his followers to do. Some groups simply celebrate life and our God-given talents.
In the absence of hearing weekly sermons, I’ve started exploring the practice of daily devotionals. I’ve landed on Common Prayer, which is like a mini church service with nuances of my Lutheran and Episcopal roots. I like the familiar, liturgical feel of the daily devotions, and it offers music selections, too, as an added bonus!
For me, turning my back on organized religion actually saved me. After leaving the church, I was compelled to make myself a better Christian rather than relying on the church or a Sunday school teacher or the clergy to cultivate my Christianity. Being accountable for growing and developing my relationship with God has required me to explore my faith on a deeper level and to notice opportunities where I can live my faith more frequently and fervently.
To be clear, I bear no contempt toward those who choose to attend church regularly. Spirituality is a personal connection with God, and we must allow ourselves to discover which exercises in faith strengthen that connection best. For some, it's organized religion; for others, it’s free form faith. Either path will lead us to God but we’ll only find Him if we travel with purpose, devotion, and a love for the journey.